Peanut Butter And Personality Quandries
Oz smiled at Xander's plea from Willow to help him with the peanut butter
jar. One of the most simple containers in the world to open, and Xander
couldn't seem to get a grasp on it. Oz intercepted the PB jar as Xander
started to pass it on to Willow, and he gave it one hard twist, passing the
open container to Buffy.
Xander gave Oz a somewhat dirty look, but it settled when Oz said, winking at
Xander, "Well, never would have been able to get it if it weren't for Xander
"Thank you ever so much, my men of manliness." Buffy smirked, and finished
making the rest of the sandwiches, handing them off.
They all moved to the Summers' dining room, where Buffy and the gang sat down
to eat their PB&J sandwiches.
"So, did you two have anything planned for your one year anniversary?" Buffy
looked to Willow and Oz.
"Well, we we're still deciding whether or not our first date was really our
first date, and then we just decided to go mini-golfing in two weeks, 'cause
that's the anniversary of our date that...counts." Willow said quickly,
taking a sip of orange juice after she was done with her peppy outpouring of
plans. Oz just nodded.
"Willow, you did bring Amy didn't you?" Buffy asked, picking the edges off
Willow smiled widely. "Yeah, she's in her home...I even brought along some of
those colorful wooden chew sticks if she gets bored."
"So, you really think this time it'll work?" Buffy picked at the corners of
"Yeah, it might take a while." Willow turned to Oz and Xander, "You guys
might wanna just go on home. I doubt you'll find a lot to do here while we
try to make a human outta Amy again."
Oz and Xander exchanged looks, and Joyce broke in, "I could give you boys a
Willow shook her head, "Oz has his van, he might as well just drive Xander
home too. Wouldn't want to bother with two trips." Joyce nodded, and headed
back off to the kitchen.
Oz turned to Xander, asking inquisitively, "So, ready to go home, or you
wanna help Miss Summers arrange her doilies and get rid of her posters for
Xander answered slowly, "I don't suppose I could wait it out to see Amy in
the nude?" Xander cracked a lame smile, and Buffy hit him on the arm, with
little force. Xander sighed, "Okay, let's go Oz."
Xander and Oz stood up, Oz giving Willow a kiss good-bye. They exchanged last
nervous glances, and left the house, walking to the van quickly.
It didn't take long after they'd started riding for Xander to mumble under
his breath, "I need to get me my own car."
They rode for a few minutes until Oz broke in to the silence, "I think we
Xander paused before talking, "About what...which kryptonite makes Superman
kiss other guys?"
Oz breathed out lightly, "I'm leaning towards the pink."
"Accurate," Xander said, a harsh breaking quality to his voice. Oz turned the
"Come on man, I'm having flashbacks to 'Red Asphalt'," Xander said, as
sharply as Oz had turned the corner.
"Me and my driving don't like awkward situations," Oz said calmly.
"Then maybe I should get out and walk," Xander said, and smiled at Oz lamely.
"Well?" Xander looked to Oz expectantly.
"I can't get out if you don't stop the van."
"Probably not. Want to try?"
"You're cute, Oz," Xander said with sugary sarcasm. "Why don't you stop the
"I know I'm cute. You are too." Oz turned the corner, slowly inching his way
to Xander's house.
"That wouldn't feel as weird if you calling me cute was more of a...cute in a
little wry whippersnapper way. Or was it? I can never tell."
"Oh, you're a guttersnipe, but you've got a great smile, and curvaceous
"So it's a double-meaning? Gee, how nifty. You know, I'm sure you tell that
to all of your girlfriend's best friends."
"Nope." Oz turned to Xander, "I know you're still confused. So am I. I only
know my motives weren't purely hormonal when I kissed you."
"Oh, I see, it was more of a charity thing since you thought I needed the
"In part. I wouldn't call it charity, though. Charity is too giving of a
word. People do things for others because they like the way it makes them
feel. That in itself is a form of self-serving." Oz paused, not used to the
stresses talking does to his facial muscles. "I figured you needed someone to
reveal the mystery of one of your personality quandaries."
"I'm not gay." Xander scowled at Oz. "I know that's what you're saying."
Oz shrugged, "Whatever."
Oz stopped, having finally reached Xander's house. He stopped the engine, and
turned towards Xander. He eyed the other boy, and began to speak, "If you
didn't think about it, you would have simply confronted me about it, or you
wouldn't be so phased, or something."
Xander shook his head, and his thigh started to fidget. He reached down with
his hand to still it, non-successfully. Oz tentatively reached out, placing
his hand over Xander's to steady it. "Do ya gotta do that, man?"
"This van doesn't take shaking well. It rocks unnaturally by the smallest
vibration. We could tip over."
"You're being cute with me again."
Oz shrugged. "Cute?"
Xander sighed, "Cute: you're a brat, but you've got great hair, and
intriguing, deep eyes."
"You could also say that about Angel."
"I shouldn't say that about either of you."
Oz smiled slightly, and ran a hand up the side of Xander's head, softly
fingering the duck-bill forming at the back of Xander's hair, and around to
his cheek. Xander shuddered. Oz withdrew his hand, "Maybe you should..." Oz
was interrupted by a horn honking, and a man yelling at him for being parked
on the wrong side of the street. Oz finished his thought, "Go in."
Xander nodded, agreeing quickly and opening up the front door. He jumped down
off the seat, this time landing on his feet, and shut the passenger side
door. "Bye." Xander said awkwardly, waving to Oz slightly as he went up the
walk to his house. He entered the front door, and closed his eyes as he heard
Oz's van pull off.
He couldn't accept it. Not in others, and certainly not in himself. Not