TITLE: Mojo vs Jojo: The Untold Story (or Sheila should just never be allowed
near a computer while on NyQuil)
AUTHOR: Sheila Perez
SUMMARY: The title pretty much says it all.
DISCLAIMER: Mojo and Jojo are the brainchildren of that Sick Puppy,
Oz, Xander, Cordelia, and Willow belong to Joss, as does the Big Gay Possum.
Nintendo belongs to other people as well. Basically, not mine, don't sue.
Oz and Xander were playing Nintendo. To be quite specific, they were
that ever-wonderful game known as Strip-Super-Mario-Brothers-3.
"Hah! I have the Powerrrrrrr!" Xander leapt off the couch, as Mario
the Leaf O' Racoonish Power and began to fly. He did a little dance, would
have made a little love if Cordelia hadn't given him a Look, and got down with
his funky party weasel-ness.
Oz watched the proceedings in bafflement, absentmindedly offering a
Mojo, the Monkey Incarnate of Good (tm).
Mojo happily grabbed the fruit and said, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK Oopoop"
roughly translated from French Monkey Babble, means "Thank you ever-so-much
Oz." Or it means "Fruit! Aww, yeah!")
Xander proceeded to beat the silly icy level of SMB3, and did yet
Crazy Dance. "Yeah! Score one for the Xand-Man!"
Willow smirked. "Fair is fair, Oz."
"All right, all right." He pulled off his shirt. "Happy?"
She grinned. "You were in doubt?"
He mock-growled at her before pouncing and kissing Willow while
Cordelia watched them before turning toward her boyfriend. "Hey! I
"Well, of course you do, my little muffin o' loooooove!" Xander
Cordelia by the waist, bending her over and pecking at her face with little
A few minutes passed before Mojo jumped on top of Cordelia's head,
breaking up the couples' little smoochies session. If it could be called
Mojo then said, "Yieeeeewoop." (translation: "Hey! I've saved your
of times! Give me food now!" or "Giles, look at *that* book!")
Cordelia shrieked. "Monkey in my hair! Monkey in my hair! Eeeeek!"
began to dance around, as Mojo chuckled and held on for the ride.
Oz sighed, picked up the NES controller and proceeded to thwap Xander
ground. Figuratively speaking, of course.
Xander sighed and pulled off his shirt as well, sticking his tongue
out at Oz.
Suddenly, in a blinding flash of purplish-green smoke, Jojo, Monkey
of Evil, appeared. He muahahahahaha'ed evilly, as he is wont to do.
"Arrrrookoook!" ("I've got you now my pretties!" or "Joyce, here,
Mojo looked at Jojo.
Mojo looked at the assembled and half-nekkid Slayerettes.
Mojo looked back at Jojo.
Mojo looked at the food.
Jojo looked at Mojo.
Jojo looked at the assembled and half-nekkid Slayerettes.
Jojo looked back at Mojo.
Jojo also looked at the food.
Jojo then made a pitiful "eeepwopwop" sound.
Oz handed him a pomegranate.
Jojo said, in cultured British tones, "Thank you." (translated: "Hah!
make you look like the Big Gay Possum again! Muahahahahahaha")
Jojo disappeared in a flash of pinkish-blue smoke with little
The assembled and half-nekkid Slayerettes looked at each other and at
who was happily munching away on grapes.
"Huh. Weird." Oz picked Willow up and headed with her into the
Willow frowned. "Weren't we supposed to, I dunno, destroy him or
"Can't destroy the Incarnation of Eeeeeevilll. Messes up the
Cordelia and Xander watched them go off.
She turned to him and frowned. "Muffin o' looooove?"
"What? I thought it was cute!"
"Yeah. In the bizarro world."
"Oh, Cordy, that's French!" He began to kiss his way up her arm.
"No it wasn't." She paused as he reached her neck. "But you can keep
Neither of them noticed the happy little monkey eating his fruit.