Jonathan Kent Woke Up Gay!
Jonathan Kent woke up just as the song on the radio was coming to an end. He hummed along to "Macho Man," as he got out of bed and stretched. In the shower, he sang "Y.M.C.A.," because that song on the radio had put him in a Village People state of mind.
He stood in front of the closet he shared with Martha, a towel wrapped around his waist and wondered why all of his clothes were so dull. Jonathan picked out a bright red and blue flannel shirt and tossed it on the bed. He went over to his dresser and pulled a pair of jeans out and added them to the shirt on the bed. Grabbing some underwear and socks from another drawer in the dresser, he headed back to the bed and sat down.
Jonathan got dressed, but the sleeves on his shirt felt too constricting. He rummaged through Martha's things until he found some scissors and cut the sleeves off. And when he pulled his jeans on, they seemed to hug his ass in a way they never had before.
Jonathan hummed to himself, trying to figure out where he'd heard the song he was humming before. It was one of the songs from that musical he had taken Martha to see in Metropolis one year for their anniversary.
He started to sing it as he took care of the cows. The cows ignored his singing, much as they always ignored the way he talked to them when he took care of them.
Later, that morning, when Martha came into the kitchen, Jonathan found himself suggesting new things she could do with her hair. She was surprised, but maybe he was right. It was time she tried something different with her hair. When Martha asked him about the sleeves on his shirt, Jonathan told her that they had gotten too snug.
She thought that was a bit odd, because he had been wearing the same flannel shirts for years and never complained about the sleeves before.
Jonathan hopped in his pickup truck and felt like listening to something besides the country music stations he had programmed on his radio. He fiddled with the radio dial and finally settled on an AM station with a faint signal from Metropolis. They were broadcasting showtunes, and that sounded just right to his ears.
"Three little maids from school are we," he sang as he drove into town.
"Three little maids from schoooool!" Jonathan sang as he pulled the truck into a parking space.
He strolled into the Talon and ordered a iced cappucino with extra whipped cream. Lex was sitting at one of the tables, discussing business with Lana, but his attention strayed to Jonathan, who stood at the counter, waiting for his drink.
Mr. Kent certainly was... muscular. Lex excused himself and got up to talk to Jonathan.
"Lex!" Jonathan boomed as he saw the younger man walking towards him. For, even though Jonathan Kent had woken up gay, some things about him would never change.
"Mister Kent, what's with the new look?" Lex's eyes roamed appreciatively up and down Jonathan's body, taking in the tight denim around his ass and crotch, and his muscular arms. Not to mention the tantalizing glimpse of chest hair that peeked out from the top of his shirt.
"Please, Lex, call me Jonathan. We've been over this before. What can I say? I woke up this morning and felt like it was time for a change."
"It certainly suits you."
Jonathan turned his attention to the girl behind the counter and paid for his drink. He picked it up and turned to head for a seat, but bumped into Lex. The cappucino, ice and whipped cream spilled all over Lex's purple shirt and black trousers.
"Lex! I'm so sorry! Here, let me help you clean that up." Jonathan grabbed napkins by the handful and attempted to help Lex clean up the mess, but only made things worse.
"Mister, I mean Jonathan, that's not necessary. Really."
Jonathan leaned in to dab at a stain on Lex's chest and said, "I think we could do a better job of taking care of these in the bathroom."
Lex grinned as he looked at Jonathan. "Why Mister Kent, are you trying to seduce me?"
"Could be," Jonathan smiled. "Now let's get those stains of yours taken care of." He headed for the bathroom and Lex followed.