Compulsion
Sirius was naked when Remus opened the door. It hadn't been locked, so Remus hadn't thought to knock, but then Sirius had had no reason to expect any of the others who shared the room to return. On this sunny afternoon, James and Peter were at a historic Quidditch demonstration along with most of the Hogwarts student body, and if Remus hadn't promised to meet that persistent young Creevey fellow in the library to help him with his Defense Against the Dark Arts essay, he'd have been down at the pitch as well.
Remus opened his mouth to try to explain this to Sirius. "Er," he said.
"Um," replied Sirius helpfully, shifting behind his trunk to hide his lower body from scrutiny.
Carefully, Remus closed and discreetly locked the door behind him. "I...was going to the library."
"Well, that explains why you're here," Sirius nodded.
Remus's face was starting to feel warm. He scratched the back of his neck. "I just need to get my bag." It was on his bed, but in order for Remus to get to it, he was going to have to come around past Sirius's bed. He dropped his gaze to the floor.
"I suppose I should explain that Snape spilled his hair-growth potion on my robes," Sirius announced brightly. "Though...the truth is that I was going to take a nap."
"On a day like this?" Remus shifted his weight from one foot to the other. He was trying very hard not to stare at Sirius's naked body. Or to think about... "I didn't realise you slept...like that."
"Well," said Sirius, as though that explained everything.
"Right," said Remus in return. He tentatively lifted his gaze, then decided that was a bad idea and stared hard at a spot on the floor.
"You could read in here," Sirius said, perhaps thinking that that way Remus would not need to retrieve his bag.
"I could. But..." He meant to explain that he was expected in the library.
"I mean," Sirius added quickly, "I could get under my covers."
Remus swallowed. His face was fully flushed now, and it only got worse when he imagined Sirius, naked, lying in a bed so close to him. "Mmm. You could. Ah," he said finally.
Sirius slid under his blanket, which fell across him and tented noticeably in the centre before he realised it and bent his knees, draping it more dramatically over himself. Remus stayed rooted to the spot, then glanced up at Sirius and blushed even more furiously. It took another moment for him to step forward and retrieve his bag from the corner of the bed. Instead of carrying it to the door, however, he withdrew a book and sat on the edge of his mattress, flipping unseeing through the pages.
"You look warm," Sirius observed.
"Oh," Remus replied. "A little."
"You could always, you know, take off your robe," added Sirius hesitantly.
Remus wanted very much to take off his robe. "I...could," he said softly. Sirius averted his eyes as he dropped his clothing to the floor and slid under his own covers. He licked his lips. "I...don't really feel like reading anymore. I thought maybe...I might take a nap, too."
"The sun's shining on your pillow," Sirius observed, even though it was really more glancing off the side of the mattress. "That's unfortunate. You know, Moony, if you can't sleep over there, maybe you could..." His friend scooted over, making room beside himself. "You could. Um," he finished, patting the bed.
If he got out of bed now, Remus realised, Sirius would get quite the eyeful. Perhaps, he thought, he could turn around and back toward the other bed, in which case Sirius would still have an eyeful, though certainly the idea of having him stare at Remus' bum wasn't quite as embarrassing as having Sirius see what he was trying to hide. But it would still be awkward. As quickly as he could manage, Remus picked up his robe from the floor, covered himself and approached the side of Sirius' bed, dropping the robe once more as he slipped under the blanket next to Sirius.
"It's very bright in the room. Do you want to close the curtain?" the other boy asked.
"Yes," said Remus before Sirius figured out that he could have done the same in his own bed. He reached out to draw the curtains, stopping himself from emitting any of the embarrassing little noises he thought about making when he settled down next to his friend. Their arms were almost touching.
"Sometimes I like to sleep as a dog," said Sirius abruptly. When Remus didn't say anything in response, he transformed, stretching himself alongside Remus and sniffing his side. Remus laughed softly as a damp nose snuffled at his ribs. It felt less awkward to be in bed with the large, affectionate dog than it had been with Sirius a moment before.
He buried the fingers of one hand in thick black fur. "No wonder it looks like your bed is shedding most of the time," he chuckled. "And stop that, it tickles!"
Padfoot moved close, perhaps knowing he could get away with touching in places as a dog that he wouldn't have dared try as a boy. He licked under Remus' jaw, pressing against his leg.
Remus squirmed a little, wondering whether he was imagining what he was feeling against his thigh. Laughing helplessly, he lifted his chin and said, "I think you missed a spot." At the invitation, Padfoot shifted awkwardly on top of him, settling his paws on Remus' chest. He nudged the boy's throat with his snout, licking gently around the collarbone. Remus caught his lip between his teeth. His hands came up and rested on Padfoot's ribcage, fingers absently stroking his fur as he tried very hard not to think about how much he was enjoying this. The dog wriggled at the sensation of human skin against his fur.
"Oh," Remus whispered, and squeezed his eyes shut. Sometimes when he transformed Padfoot would jokingly hump his leg, but this was turning into something much more dangerous. He wanted to rub his straining cock into the soft welcoming fur, but had no idea what his friend would do if he tried. Even as a dog. Or particularly as a dog.
A happy growl welled in Padfoot's throat. The sound made Remus shiver, and his fingers tightened a little in the sleek fur. "Sirius," he gasped, tugging the dog closer. The name worked like a summons: Padfoot metamorphosed again, turning back into a human being, leaving Remus in the awkward position of finding himself not snuggling an affectionate dog but lying beneath his best friend. Remus arched clumsily against Sirius' damp skin, slick with Padfoot's sweat. With another gasp he lifted his head.
"Oh," he said again, and kissed Sirius. It felt awkward, rather like he'd never kissed anyone before, but Remus was too far gone to spend too much time worrying about it. Sirius' teeth were sharp against his lips before he opened them and his cock pulsed against Remus' belly. "Sirius," whispered Remus, almost reverentially, and kissed him again -- less desperately this time, trying to be gentle. But his fingers would not relax, and he thrust uncontrollably against Sirius' thigh.
"You smell good, Moony," Sirius mumbled vaguely before biting down on Remus' earlobe.
"So do you," Remus said breathlessly, as he tried to disengage, hungry to capture Sirius' mouth with his own again. His lips brushed Sirius' jaw. "Sirius...please." That was the third time Remus had called Sirius by name -- his own name, not Padfoot's, which meant that Remus couldn't pretend that he was just being daft with the dog. Not that his friend seemed to mind. Shifting slightly, he felt Sirius press hard against his abdomen.
"Please what?" Sirius asked.
Remus bit back a moan and closed his eyes once more, frantic not to do or say anything embarrassing. "Please...kiss me again," he whispered finally. Shudders convulsed his body; in truth he could not have said whether he was on the edge or simply terrified. But Sirius eagerly granted his request, parting Remus' lips and letting Remus seek out the sharp incisors, the soft ticklish palate, before finally wrapping their tongues together. The pressure in his groin was growing painful. Without thinking he slid a hand down to relieve it, but the cock his fumbling fingers encountered was not his own.
"Agh!" The cry sounded almost like a bark, then Sirius' parted lips returned to Remus' mouth as his hand swept across Remus' side to wrap his erection in clutching heat. Remus broke the sweet, electric kiss when Sirius touched him there. He cried out, "Oh! Oh--!" and then shook all over as he sprayed hot fluid into Sirius' palm and up his arm. He thought he might die of mortification, but Sirius groaned with him and held on, continuing to stroke until Remus had gone still. When Sirius pulled his hand away, he raised slick fingers to his face, moving it close enough to sniff.
Still gasping for breath, Remus watched in fascination; then, tentatively, he strained upwards, flicking his tongue out against Sirius' fingers. He had no idea if the other boy might be disgusted but rationalised that he spent hours as a dog, just as attuned to scents as a werewolf. Sirius lowered his hand, trembling when Remus licked it; at the look in the other boy's eyes, Remus sucked in a finger. With a harsh groan, Sirius grabbed at his free wrist, pulling it back to his groin, begging, "Now, please..."
Remus sucked more insistently on the finger in his mouth and wrapped his hand around Sirius' swollen cock. Sirius pushed frantically into Remus' strokes, making a noise in his throat more suited to Padfoot than himself, though it only encouraged Remus who took another finger between his lips and shifted his legs to give the other boy more leverage. The new angle let Sirius press his chest against Remus, and, howling, his rhythmic thrusts dissolved in hot liquid pulses.
Remus held on tight to Sirius for a few moments, listening to his harsh breathing and enjoying the novel feel of someone else's come on his skin. Then he gently pushed his friend's weight off of him, rolling him onto his back. When Sirius peered up at him, Remus smiled shyly before leaning over him, ducking his head with great care to lick up the sweat at the base of Sirius' throat. "All right?" he asked, softly.
"Oh," said Sirius, which seemed to be the only word he remembered. "Oh." Then he squirmed as Remus' tongue tickled him, giggling unexpectedly. "Moony."
Taking this as encouragement, Remus reached out for Sirius' hand, which he brought up to his mouth. He licked the palm, trailing his tongue over and around each finger before he pressed a kiss to the wrist and released the hand. Then he moved back to the tempting neck, lapping away the sweat with broad strokes of his tongue before going lower, tasting each nipple, feeling delighted when he heard Sirius gasp. He paused a moment and took a breath before he bent over Sirius' belly and began to clean up as much as he could while one of his hands trailed idly up Sirius' leg.
"Moony," Sirius gasped again. The fingers that Remus has just licked clean slid into his hair. All his senses seemed to be heightened; Sirius' scent was all over him, and he could still taste the other boy's mouth on his.
Even when there were no more traces of come left on the other boy's skin, Remus continued licking him. As he worked his way back up Sirius' ribcage, he pushed himself a little higher, pressed a knee between Sirius' thighs and leaned more fully over him. Eventually they were nose-to-nose again, and Remus peered down into Sirius' eyes, smiling shyly once more.
"That was brilliant," Sirius whispered, though he looked a bit embarrassed, perhaps even afraid. Remus could feel his cock stiffening once more against Sirius, who blinked in surprise. "You want...again?" he managed.
Remus felt rather awkward from the unease in Sirius' eyes, and bit his lip as he glanced away. The werewolf's metabolism enabled him to recover with impressive speed even for a teenaged boy, and he frequently needed to come three or four times before he felt relief from his urges. "Yes," he replied breathlessly, thinking how much he would like to be licked, too. He wanted very much to feel a wet tongue on his own skin.
Sirius turned until they had both rolled onto their sides, keeping one leg wrapped over Remus' thigh. His hands had moved onto Remus' shoulders and he slid them down, tentatively brushing his thumbs over the nipples. Remus shuddered and pressed closer, letting his senses become overwhelmed. He flicked his tongue over Sirius' bottom lip, then closed his eyes with a sigh. His hips moved reflexively, rubbing himself against Sirius' belly while he groaned softly. "Siri...Padfoot. I--I want...please."
Burying his face against Remus' throat, Sirius pressed his lips where the blood pounded through the artery. He followed it down, uncertainly flicking out his tongue to taste Remus' nipple as Remus had done to him, then sucking more confidently when Remus groaned again and sank his fingers into Sirius' hair. It was almost like petting an animal's silky mane, and Sirius growled a little, encouraging. The sound made Remus shiver. "Please," he said again, unable to say anything else. He arched up, in encouragement and need, wanting so much that he couldn't put into words. One hand slid over Sirius' shoulder and his back, and he shivered again. "Padfoot..."
Remus wondered whether the transformation into the dog felt anything like the bone-wrenching compulsion in him to become a wolf at the full moon. He felt Sirius stiffen at the dog's name, then relax into it, and for a moment it felt as though the boy had turned inside out, soft in places he'd been hard moments earlier. His skin burned, shivered, alive all over, metamorphosing. Then he lay against Remus, panting, fur sticking to sweaty flesh, extending his canine tongue for a long hungry taste.
Remus tilted his chin back, eager to let Padfoot explore as much skin as he could. A moan rose up unbidden as he buried his fingers deep in fur, wanting to hold on and not let go -- wanting to bury his face against the dog's neck. He was sure he wanted things that he wasn't really going to let himself think about. But he knew this was his best friend; that neither would ever do something the other didn't want. He relaxed his grip, stroking his fingers down Padfoot's back. Words stuck in his throat, and he moaned again.
Padfoot shifted, using quiet throaty sounds to communicate without words that it was all right. He was licking down Remus' chest toward the thicker hair spreading below his navel, sniffing as though he could smell both of them. Remus recalled the sweet-salty taste of Sirius' sweat and the bitter come that he knew had dried there. It was so good, and he loved the feel of Padfoot rocking over him while he stroked and clutched at his ears; but then his cock prodded under Padfoot's jawbone, and Padfoot took a slow lick all around the shaft, which was even better.
Remus let out a sound that even he could only describe as a wolf-like whine. He was quaking again, his eyes wide open and he stared up at the bed's canopy as he breathed in harshly through his mouth. He wouldn't pretend that he hadn't thought about Sirius doing this to him but he hadn't imagined that the first time would be with Padfoot, and oh bloody hell the dog's tongue was long. He whined again as the tongue licked over and around him, and held on to Padfoot's fur for dear life.
Padfoot nudged Remus' legs further apart with his paws so he could get his head lower. He swiped his tongue into the dark crack, tasting. That long, long tongue just there made Remus arch his back with a cry--a loud, sharp noise that he was certain he'd only ever made as the wolf, before. When the tongue licked him again, he collapsed to the mattress, whining helplessly in his throat, though he spread his thighs wider. The fingers of one hand stroked Padfoot's head, his ears, while the other hand wrapped around his own cock. "Ohh," he moaned, "oh, please!"
Panting harshly, Remus stroked himself hard, fast -- he was aching deep inside and he needed it, needed to come again, with Padfoot on his belly between Remus' thighs, with that tongue touching tasting him, driving him well and truly mad. He howled once more as he spurted over his fist and belly, wondering if they could hear him down in the dungeons. When he fell back, bonelessly, he tried to breathe.
Everything smelled better as a dog, everything tasted good, especially other animals...which included people. Blood was meaty, piss was like musk, and arousal leaked out of every pore, light and sweet in the sweat, and thick around and behind the cock and balls.
As Padfoot, Sirius could smell Remus climaxing before he felt it -- the fluid dripping from his cock became tangier, more potent, and wave after wave of pheromones washed out in his sweat. A few times, practicing transformation in his bed, he'd caught that miasma from across the room and gone practically insane trying not to follow it to its source. He hadn't dared to ask his friend if he could make him come, but he had a pair of Moony's stained shorts hidden between the sheet and mattress under his pillow that he sometimes nudged with his snout, immersing him in that much-craved scent.
His heart hadn't stopped racing since Remus had entered the room, first in shame at having been caught about to -- well, he was pretty sure Moony could guess what sort of relaxation he'd been planning -- then in growing excitement as he realised that the frequent subject of his fantasies was standing, staring, in no hurry to escape. And now, like a dream, he was in Sirius' bed, letting Padfoot put his nose and tongue in places they had ached to seek out from the time he learned to become a dog. Sirius was hard again, his cock emerging from its protective fur to rub against the unforgiving sheets. The moment the come stopped spurting out of Remus, he dragged himself forward and began to lap it up, drinking the warm seed from his skin.
Remus whimpered, lifting his head to watch. He chewed on his lip, and when Padfoot was finished, he sat up and wrapped his arms around the dog, pressing his nose into fur, his hands rubbing over sleek wriggling back and sides. "Yours," he murmured.
Padfoot had to fight down an immediate urge to make the word true, to mark Remus, which he was quite sure would make his friend leap out of bed and never come back. He'd done it to Remus' clothes, covering them with his scent before scourgifying them, burning with shame all the while but unable to resist the dog's impulses. At least now Remus could not see his face. Sirius whimpered and nuzzled under the boy's arm, enjoying the feel of the warm hands over his fur. The bed shook, and he realised that his own tail was thumping the mattress.
Remus laughed quietly. "Looks like somebody's happy," he teased, absently scratching at one of Padfoot's ears. He rubbed his cheek against Padfoot's neck. "You were brilliant," he said. "Really. I--never felt like that. Never thought you'd..."
Padfoot had swiped his tongue across Remus' mouth in a sloppy kiss before he realised that he'd stopped Remus from finishing the sentence. Not without some regret, he transformed back into Sirius, dropping his eyes when he saw his friend gazing at him. He was still hard, but now instead of revelling in his unkempt, sweaty state, he felt awkward and unattractive. What if Moony preferred the dog?
Remus framed Sirius' face with his hands and kissed him, softly and tenderly, all hesitation gone, though perhaps still a little awkwardly. He pushed damp hair away from Sirius' eyes. "Maybe we should do something about...that," he said.
Sirius had thought he might not yet be ready, but the words and the promise in Remus' voice made him ache with longing. He shifted his feet under his legs so that he was kneeling, watching his friend to see what Remus had in mind. "Are you sure this isn't...all too much?" he asked.
Remus flushed, yet he was smiling. "I've been thinking about you ever since I started to understand what all these feelings were all about," he admitted, lowering himself down onto his belly between Sirius' knees. "Let's look at this as--back payment. I'd hate to leave you like this..." He flicked out his tongue, teasing Sirius with a short lick to the head of his cock.
His entire body jerking, Sirius clutched at Remus' shoulders for support. He was sure Remus must know that he had interrupted him about to wank when he came in to retrieve his bag, but he wasn't sure how to explain that the impulses had started in earnest at the same time he'd learned to become a dog, when the focus of all his confusing aches and desires suddenly became very clear and apparent, someone he could hear and smell all around him. He had been afraid to think about how his affection for his friend fit in with the dog's urges, and despite the pleasure flooding him as Remus' mouth moved over his cock, he realised that he was still afraid.
"Fuck, Moony," Sirius gasped, thrusting upward uncontrollably, even though he feared that he'd choke Remus and make him pull away. Remus' fingernails dug into Sirius' skin as though the other boy expected to find fur there instead. Mine, he wanted to say, the way Remus had said Yours, but that had been to Padfoot, not to him. Was there a difference? Another swipe of the tongue over the tip of his cock sent his thoughts scattering in a blaze of sensation, and he groaned, thrusting harder, feeling Remus angle his mouth to take more of him in. Sweat dripped down Sirius' belly.
Remus brought his hands forward as he rested carefully on his elbows. While one palm stroked Sirius' cock, the other teased his balls with light, delicate touches before a finger eased further back, seeking out the entrance to Sirius' body. The finger probing at him made Sirius feel wonderful and awful at the same time. His face grew hot, he felt dizzy, not wanting to be so open, not ready. Yet his body outraced his mind, responding to Remus' touch, spreading his legs wider, thrusting faster, speeding towards a climax he couldn't control.
"Sirius..." Remus lifted his mouth away and looked up. "Don't try to stop it... please?" Then he returned his mouth to Sirius' cock, and the tip of his finger pushed gently against the tight hole, breaching it just a bit.
This wasn't an entirely new sensation -- Sirius had done it to himself several times, using spit and various potions to ease the opening. He'd wondered what it might feel like had it been someone's -- Remus' -- cock. Yet it was terrifying to have someone else in his body, and in his head, for he could feel Remus everywhere, really feel him, not just smell and taste him; this wasn't just about what the dog wanted, nor what his aching flesh wanted. "No--" Sirius gasped, his entire body convulsing. "I don't, Moony...just...PLEASE..."
Remus withdrew his finger, focussing all his attentions on the cock in his mouth. He stroked Sirius' thigh in a way that Sirius suspected was meant to be reassuring. Sirius felt his control disappear. He shuddered, wondering whether Padfoot somehow took possession of him at moments of raw physical pleasure. "I'm...Moony..." he tried to warn him, but as the flare of climax wiped across his thoughts, the word that broke through was, "Mine..."
Remus swallowed greedily, as if he were the wolf and not Sirius' friend. He lapped at Sirius' cock, cleaning him tenderly before he moved away, to lie against the pillows again. Tugging Sirius to him, he held his shuddering friend against him. "Yours," he said again, finally, smiling.
"I...didn't mean to say that," Sirius said into Remus' hair, unable to face him. "I'm sorry, Moony...to want you as a dog, that can't be right..."
"You--don't you want me?" asked Remus in a small voice, gulping.
"Yes, I want you!" Sirius burst out, astonished that Remus somehow hadn't understood that. "I wanted you before I knew how to be Padfoot. But...it's bad enough to want boys...to be animals on top of it, and this is all so fast, I don't know..."
"Why--why should it matter?" Remus' wide eyes were wounded. "If you're worried about what happens in the future, maybe you won't react the same way around someone who's not a werewolf. Maybe that's the only reason you...react."
"I don't want someone who's not a werewolf. I smell you!"
The confession burst out of Sirius, sounding so ridiculous that he expected to be laughed at, though Remus just continued to look at him. "But -- you are Padfoot. Maybe even more than I'm Moony, since you chose it. The dog is part of you. You're not really separate entities, are you?"
"No! That's my point!" grated Sirius. "What happens when we have to be around other people, and our families? I didn't always have this. An hour ago I wasn't even sure if you liked boys. I didn't know if you liked me. Maybe you're right, maybe I won't ever react like that to anyone else, maybe it won't always be so simple and obvious..." He stopped himself, suddenly horrified.
"I wish it was so simple and obvious for me," said Remus, half to himself, clutching at the sheet beneath his fingers.
Sirius froze, choking on the things he'd almost said. If it wasn't simple and obvious to Moony, then maybe this was all wrong, just experimentation or making sure that everything worked the way it was supposed to even though he was a werewolf. "I'm sorry, I didn't realise," he babbled as he shifted away, pulling at the covers that they had kicked aside.
Remus reached out and grabbed Sirius' wrist. "Sirius. Did I pull away from you? Don't you think that if it bothered me, I would have told you to stop? I wanted it just as much as you did. I'm a werewolf, in case you hadn't noticed--I just--never really thought anybody could want that."
"Oh, for...Moony, I go looking for your things to smell. Sometimes I chew on them." He almost told him about the marking, and about taking Remus' discarded shirts and hiding them among his own things, letting his friend believe that the house elves had lost them in the laundry so he could suck on them when no one else was in the room. "Why did you think I was hiding under the covers from the time you walked in?"
Remus looked down at the blankets to hide the naughty grin that suddenly sprang to life on his face. "Since you were naked...I kind of figured you were going to have some private time."
"That was the general idea, yes. In case you hadn't noticed, I asked you to join me."
"Then...why are you upset? You're arguing with me. You look ashamed."
Sirius sighed again, feeling terrible for ruining this for both of them. "You know what my family's like. They think little enough of me just for being a Gryffindor rather than a Slytherin. Do you have any idea what they'd say if they knew I was...queer? It would be easier if we had just done this on a whim."
Remus bit his lip. "Do you want me to tell you that I did this on a whim? I didn't. I've...felt -- about you -- for quite a while now."
Breath rushing out, Sirius let himself slide down against Remus' side. His voice was muffled by skin when he spoke. "Me too. Before I knew, I think. About the wolf. But Moony, since I've learned to change, it's all so strange, feeling things as a dog...and what we just did, that wasn't, even, you know, for people like us, that wasn't normal..."
"But..." Remus' fingers tightened on Sirius' wrist. "It felt--right. Didn't it? Maybe we're just...right. For each other. Maybe we should stop thinking about it. Maybe we should just -- go with it."
Sirius swallowed. "It felt better than right. It felt better than I ever imagined it." He was about to shift closer to Remus again when he realised how sticky he was -- his hands and most of the front of his body. "D'you suppose we should wash off?" he asked with a slight laugh. "Before everyone knows? Because, you know, if we figured out about you, it won't take James any time at all to figure out about us. He can always tell when I've transformed into Padfoot in here; he says it smells like wet dog."
Remus nodded. "Oh, he's right, it does. Washing would probably be a good idea." But he didn't move, and Sirius found that he was getting hard again, possibly from the smell of them on his bedsheets. Remus let his fingers trail along the inside of his arm. "I think, though, maybe, just a good 'scourgify' will do the trick."
The faint tickle made Sirius shiver. "You'll have to do it, then. I was never any good at that spell."
"My wand is in my robe."
"Oh." Sirius really did not want Remus to get up from the bed. "I suppose we could do it later," he said hopefully.
"I suppose we could," Remus agreed. "After all, we should still have...oh, maybe another couple of hours before we should expect anybody to come back..." He inched his mouth a little closer to Sirius'. "Merlin's beard, Padfoot, I really want to kiss you again."
"Then just..." Sirius realised suddenly that he really didn't want to finish the sentence. He leaned in, feeling their sticky skin slide together. When it was fur again, he knew, it wouldn't matter. Nothing would matter but themselves, together -- not his family, not their friends, not the awful monthly alteration that had changed first Remus' life, then his own. He kissed Remus warm and slow, realising that he wouldn't give this up over any of them...not Padfoot, not himself.