List
by Ishafel

Ron makes lists of his dead, but he cannot decide how to categorize them. Should he do them all at once, in alphabetical order, or by horoscope? Should he categorize them into friends, family, acquaintances? He makes lists of his failures, what Hermione might have called his sins. He makes lists of his kills, of his possessions, of mixed drinks, spells he used to know but has forgotten. Draco Malfoy's name isn't on any of Ron's lists, but he's never far from Ron's thoughts. He writes his lists on scraps of paper, on edges of the tablecloth, but he always copies them over into a notebook in his best writing.

Draco's mixed up in his head with lists, because Draco makes lists too. Ron found one once, dropped under Draco's seat in the Potions classroom. A list of names. Harry's was at the top, and Ron's at the bottom. No title, and Ron has always wondered what it was a list of. People Draco hated? People he wanted to destroy? Lucius Malfoy's name was third on the list. Everyone on it is dead. Everyone but Ron. But somehow Ron can't see Draco as a wizard serial killer. Serial killers are obsessively tidy, and they don't make lists on the back of old Transfigurations essays and leave them laying about.

No, whatever Draco's done wrong, Ron can hardly blame him for the war. The names on Draco's list were casualties, not murder victims. He makes a new list: ways to punish Draco. Most of them are also on his tortures list. He despises redundancy. He finds a Floo address for Malfoy Manor tucked inside a book in the Restricted Section, and he wonders who wrote it so carefully and tucked it away. He makes a list of possibilities, a list three pages long.

He watches Draco, when the opportunity arises, and he makes lists, and one day he sees that Draco is watching him back. He isn't sure what to do about it so he doesn't do anything. He doesn't stop watching Draco but he doesn't try to catch his attention, either. There's something risqué about it. He writes lists, that's all.

Every day he goes to lunch, leaving his notebook locked in his desk. Sometimes when he comes back it seems to be in a different place, although he can't be sure. He wonders if someone's reading it. If Draco's reading it. The idea is too absurd to contemplate. He makes a list of suspects and Draco's name is nowhere on it. Draco sends him memos, not just to him but also to the whole staff. He uses bullet points, so they're lists, really. There's something erotic about them. Ron knows he needs help. He makes a list of potential psychiatric problems he thinks might be causing this behavior. It's a good list, one of Ron's better ones. He learned a lot about psychiatric problems during the war.

Months go by, and Ron begins to think Draco is following him. He makes a list of places he's seen Draco recently--everywhere from the barber's to the greengrocer's. He supposes it must be coincidental. If he takes the train Draco is watching him from behind a newspaper. Draco lurks outside his classroom while he's teaching. The students he has conferences with mention "Professor Malfoy," and Ron wonders whether Draco's arranged this.

On Fridays during term Ron sometimes goes to his local for a drink. Draco is always there, but they never do more than nod at one another in a civilized manner. There's nothing between them. They aren't friends, they aren't even enemies. Ron makes a list of courtship rituals, and he knows he won't dare to use them on Draco. He makes a list of people he'd like to go to bed with, and Draco Malfoy is at the top. It's the first time he's ever written Draco's name.

That Friday Draco buys Ron a drink. They sit at a dark table in the corner for hours. Ron asks Draco what he does for fun, and Draco says that he's never given up Quidditch. Ron doesn't mention his own hobby. After closing they go back to Hogwarts and go to bed in Draco's apartment.

It turns out that sex lends itself perfectly to listmaking.

  1. Draco turns on the lights with a flick of his wand, and Ron looks curiously around as his eyes adjust and then Draco is pushing him back against the closing door, their bodies pressed hard together. And Draco's tongue is in Ron's mouth, but lightly, delicately, as if he knows better than to rush Ron.
  2. And they kiss that way for a long time, Ron's hand tangling in Draco's hair. Ron's penis growing hard under Draco's gentle hand. Ron's eyes are closed but he suspects Draco's are open. He can feel the door panel pressing into his back but he doesn't mind.
  3. Draco undoes Ron's shirt so quickly and easily he almost doesn't notice, and runs his fingers from Ron's throat to the waist of his trousers. Ron wonders why Draco still has so many clothes on.
  4. Draco pulls Ron from the doorway to the couch, pressing Ron down even as he fumbles with his cufflinks. Ron ends up on his back, with Draco straddling him, and their dicks almost but not quite rubbing together. He reaches up and touches Draco's nipple a little tentatively and Draco gasps and bites his lip dramatically.
  5. Ron's glad he likes it, because he's never done anything quite like this before. He stretches to take Draco's nipple in his mouth, and is surprised by the softness and the saltiness of it.
  6. Draco pushes Ron away, but gently, and the words he whispers seem to be endearments. His erection pulses against Ron's thigh. He slides his hand down Ron's front and under Ron's slacks, into Ron's pants. His hand cups Ron's dick.
  7. Ron gets completely hard, right away. He's aware that his penis is leaking, that it's getting on Draco's hand on his pants, possibly even on Draco's robes. Somehow he finds that thought even more erotic.
  8. Draco rubs firmly along Ron's erection, using the sort of grip Ron demonstrates to his Muggle students with their first wands. One of his fingernails nicks Ron's glans, sharply, and Ron convulses. Draco speeds up his rubbing.
  9. Ron explodes into Draco's hand. His eyes cross and his heart stops. He flops back on the couch, gasping for breath like a drowning fish.
  10. Draco says, "Well, hurry up, then, you didn't think it was all over did you?" and Ron's penis twitches.

 

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