The Nearness Of You
Two loves can leave you tiresome and unfilled. Monica loves Chandler, she does. But Rachel is different, she's familiar and Monica craves routine, familiarity. Without it, her world is chaos. And Rachel is all these things, comfortable and recognizable and warmth. She's so gentle in her ways, so fierce. Yet she seems greatly unprotected.
Monica feels that's her responsibility: to be the mother of the group. No one knows how Monica feels, and if they do, they don't say a word. She prefers it that way.
That day Rachel ran into Central Perk, bedraggled and wet, still resonates in Monica's mind. She immediately wanted to take her in. Rachel was pitiful with her ragged breaths and drenched dress.
She'd lie awake and wonder if Rachel was asleep on the other side of the wall. And She was so hesitant for Rachel to move out when she did, even if it meant Monica had the beginning of a new life with Chandler.
Monica used to be grateful to Rachel when they were in high school, because she was always accepted. Rachel was the belle of the ball, and Monica, although overweight, was right by Rachel's side. As it always should be. After they went their separate ways after high school, Monica felt incomplete and empty.
But Rachel is across the hall and Monica's content, once more. She craves the sporadic visits Rachel tends to make. After she leaves, Monica can still inhale the lingering of Rachel's favorite Chanel scent. And when she touches Monica's hand, Monica thrills at the closeness, the softness of the skin, and nearness of the one she loves.