Vigil
by zahra

On the last day of the last year at the end of the last battle, Draco Malfoy will go to the top of the highest hill on the outskirts of Hogsmeade and wait for Harry Potter.

This will be his decision: the culmination of years of anger and hatred and desire.

Draco will wait, with a patience that he has only recently been granted, and he will not mind. He knows what is to come: the sky will be set on fire, and the earth will be scorched beyond recognition.

The end will have come at last, and it won't be about pride and falls.

It will be about a simple desire.

 

The sun will rise in the east as Draco makes his way, carefully, to the top of the hill. His steps will be precise and even, they will never falter despite the rocks and other detritus. There are 1,253 steps to the top. It's a long walk, but Draco will never break a sweat. He will never grow tired.

There will be golden shards of light crawling over green grass, and birds singing songs that Draco will ignore. He will hum a little tune by a Muggle singer that he's not supposed to know, and he will pick at the threads on his best, white Oxford shirt.

It's not actually white anymore.

As the sun crests over the top of the hill, Draco will shove his hands in his pockets and begin to think of other sunrises spent in detention. He will also think of all-night study sessions and the roof of a derelict house in a non-wizarding part of town. When he reaches the paramount, he will sit down and begin the day. There are groves of trees to count and birds to spy. He's got plenty of time to let go by.

Draco will begin to pick at the blades of grass, and try to do that Muggle trick that makes it whistle. He's never been that good at it, but he's getting better.

It will have taken him 45 minutes to reach the top.

 

At noon, the sun will be unbearable, and there will be sweat building along Draco's hairline. His neck will turn red with the burn, and he will unfasten another button on his shirt, trying very hard not to think about the limits of the human body.

It's all psychosomatic, but Draco has never been a great fan of the heat.

Instead he will divert himself by trying to remember illegal potions that turn people into fairy tales and exactly how he felt the first time he caught the Snitch. Draco will begin pulling at the grass underneath the jeans he's wearing, unconsciously falling into nervous habits he's not supposed to have. He will get dirt and grass on these jeans as well, which really doesn't matter as these jeans were never his at all.

He will think of the first time that he heard The Rolling Stones, and the way that Harry used to relax under him when Draco would kiss him at night.

Draco will think a lot about Harry Potter. He will think a lot about his father.

He will make every effort not to turn in the direction of smoke and endless screaming.

 

The sun will begin to set, leaving a rose and lavender cast across the sky, and Draco will gather himself together. He will stand up and brush the grass from his clothes and the dirt from his hands.

He will wipe his palms on his trousers and not care about smudges and stains.

That's the thing about being incorporeal: the little things don't really matter.

As the second to last rays of light fall into the west, Draco will turn to the east and see a ghost waiting for him. Harry's face will be covered with dirt and his eyes will be illuminated by dying light. He won't say anything important, but Harry will smile just for Draco and that's what Draco's been waiting for since the day he died. The big smile reserved for special secrets and mornings spent hiding under the duvet.

Draco will approach him, cautiously at first, because he's been waiting a long time. But then he'll have an irresistible urge to brush the leaves out of Harry's hair or wipe the dirt off Harry's nose, and wind up kissing Harry instead because he's been waiting for this moment his entire life.

Kissing isn't just a province of the living, and maybe life will be better now that they're both dead.

So when the sun is long gone, and there's no light left to see from except the waning moon, Draco will take Harry by the hand and walk them both back to his grave.

And on the last day of forever, Harry will ask him if they're finally going home.

 

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