Family Traditions
"It's Christmas, where's my daddy?" Dru's petulant cry claimed Spike's attention.
Spike hated this. Every year since Angelus had left them nearly a century before, Dru spent the entire bloody month of December whining about how her 'daddy' wasn't with them. "He's not here, Dru. He left us, and he's not coming back."
Dru pouted. "But it's Christmas. Christmas is a time for families you know. And daddy always brought me such nice things."
Spike was frustrated. It was already mid-December and he'd had just about as much as he could stand. "He's gone, and it's going to stay that way. Don't I bring you nice things?"
Dru smiled then, "Oh yes, my Spikey brings me lovely things, dresses, and dolls, and beautiful girls, but I want daddy's presents."
"I'm going out Dru. I'll be back. Don't go out, love." Spike grabbed his jacket and left before he had to hear another word. He moved quickly, with no real destination in mind. He just had to escape the endless demands of Drusilla. He loved her, worshiped her really, but she could try anyone's patience. He would find her a gift, something beautiful. She'd always loved beautiful things. He would find her a girl and perhaps another doll. She did love her dolls.
Spike was so lost in thought, that he almost didn't see the flash of black clothes and coat that turned abruptly when he came into view. When he realized what that flash was, he growled and chased after it. He caught up with the man a block later. "What in bloody hell are you doing here?" Spike shouted at his sire and the indirect object of his frustrations.
"I've been here for months Spike, it's you that's new. I'm surprised to see you without Dru. As I recall, she always liked Christmas." Angel's voice came out calm, though his demeanor was nervous.
Spike laughed, a harsh sound that invoked not the slightest feeling of merriment. "Oh, she loves Christmas. It's a bloody nightmare for me. Do you want to know how I've spent the last few weeks? Listening to her yammer on about how you should be there, about the things you gave her, and about how Christmas is for family. I had to get away from there, besides I have to find her a gift, and even though I know it will never be as grand as the things you brought her, I feel I have to try."
Angel glances away, unable to look at his childe as he speaks. He had never realized what his leaving would have done to Dru. He never understood how it changed them all. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry. And what exactly are you sorry for? Sorry that I have to listen to Dru's incessant whining or sorry that you abandoned us with your bitch of a sire? Or maybe you're just sorry that you created Dru in the first place. That would have been convenient for you, to not have Dru or I to worry about." Spike is practically shouting now.
"I'd think that you at least were better off without me. You never cared much for our holiday 'festivities.'" Angel tries to shed a bit of his guilt by forcing Spike to remember how he was treated.
It doesn't work. Spike is infuriated at Angel's comment, shifting abruptly into game face and leaping at Angel, pressing him into the cold stone of the nearest building. "And which 'festivities' would you be referring to? The ones where you fucked my girlfriend and made me watch, all the while berating me? Or perhaps the ones where you fucked me until I bled? Which is it Angelus?" Spike pressed his entire body along the length of Angel's back, bringing his mouth up next to the larger man's ear. "I don't think you're sorry at all."
Angel closed his eyes, as if doing so would block the flood of images from his past. He didn't want to remember the moments spent pushing a woman over the line between pain and pleasure, or her joy at that moment. He didn't want to remember that he was the one who broke her, made her crave the pain. He didn't want to remember holding down Dru's young childe, turned when still an innocent, and how he ripped that innocence away. Didn't want to remember pounding into that unwilling body, claiming it for his own. But more than any of that, he didn't want to feel the sharp burst of lust that the images evoked. He wanted to believe that those actions only caused disgust in him, that he could not possibly respond to them now that his soul was restored.
Spike however, knew better. He slipped one hand around Angel's waist sliding it down to brush against the hard line of Angel's erection. "It makes you hard, the things you did to us. The punishment." He grinds his own erection against Angel's ass. "Christmas was different. Not for Dru, you gave her what she wanted, pain, hot and blinding. But I don't remember the pain, not at first. Christmas always started out wonderful, but by the 26th, I was used up. There was pain then, searing pain. You called it punishment, well I think you're the one who deserves punishment now."
"Please." The single word is all that escapes Angel's mouth. He's only half sure of what he means. A part of him is frightened of Spike. He created a cold and ruthless killer when he broke the child that was William, and now, Spike was stronger full of fresh, human blood. At the same time, he felt he deserved Spike's punishment. He deserved it for destroying everything pure and bright that he had ever come across. Technically, he hadn't been the cause of William's lost innocence. There are no innocent vampires, but if it weren't for him, Spike would not exist. He deserved punishment for twisting the creature that William would have become into this monster.
Spike threw the man he had once idolized to the ground. "Now, you understand it, how it felt. You know what it is to plead without knowing what you're pleading for, whether you just want the nightmare to end or to feel the sharp slice of pleasure buried in the pain." Spike moved as he spoke, ripping Angel's clothes from his body, thankful that they had turned down the darkened alley. "I'll make you beg, still not knowing what for." Even in his anger, Spike was not as cruel as Angelus had once been. He spared the older vampire the pain of simply taking him, instead moving down his body, claiming with mouth and teeth.
Angel trembled under Spike's touch. In all his many long years of existence, he had never felt so utterly out of control. His entire existence as a vampire had been about keeping and holding control. He had worshiped his sire for her role in his life, and his own childe had been a lovely plaything, but they both accepted his dominance without protest. Drusilla's unruly and unconventional childe had been different. He had pushed every boundary, right from the start. It infuriated Angel, even as the first tendrils of affection began to reach his heart. The boy made him feel, and that was not to be accepted, it meant he had control, and that Angel would not allow. And so, he had spent hours, days, weeks even, teaching Spike just how subordinate he was, how easily dominated. It hadn't worked, but it had at least allowed Angelus to maintain the illusion of control. Even after his soul was restored, Angel's existence was about maintaining control. At first, that control came almost completely in the form of mastering the thirst, now it came also by denying himself the pleasures of humanity as well as of vampirism. He would not eat or drink human food, he avoided any kind of personal interaction, and he would not feed on human blood. But Spike had stripped that illusion away even as he stripped away his clothes. He was not in charge here. He held no power. Spike held it all.
When Spike's mouth reached Angel's ass he bit down hard, tearing the flesh there until blood flowed freely. With one hand, he worked blood into Angel's tight opening, with the other, he slicked it along his own achingly hard cock, and with no more preparation than that, he slammed into Angel's body.
Angel cried out in both pain and pleasure. He and Dru had taught Spike well, he knew how to walk that line. "Please. Oh God, please."
Spike bent close to speak into Angel's ear again. "Please what, Angelus. If you want to end this, say so, I'm not a rapist, not quite." When Angel didn't respond, Spike continued. "Or perhaps it was this you were begging for." He slowly and torturously light ran one slim finger along the length of Angel's cock. Angel moaned and tried to shift into the touch but Spike held him tight. "I thought so." Spike picked up the pace and strength of his thrusts all the while, barely touching Angel. It was just a few moments until he was on the brink of orgasm. A single wrenching pull to Angel's cock pushed him over the brink. Angel screamed as his muscles clenched around Spike.
The two stayed tightly clenched together for a moment before Spike shoved Angel roughly away. Angel lay still, facing away from Spike so his childe would not see the tears threatening to escape his eyes. "You went away without a fucking word. You left us without so much as a thought, why, you bastard." Spike edged on hysteria.
"I didn't know. I didn't know." The words are little more than a whisper.
"Well, now you do, but it won't bring you back will it?" Spike sounds calm now, old, bitter, but calm. Angel doesn't answer and after a moment, Spike tucks himself back into his jeans and walks away.
He returns to his secret place where Dru is waiting for him. "Did you bring me a present?" Her childish voice calls out to him.
"Not tonight, pet. I promise, tomorrow I'll bring you things more lovely than you've ever dreamed." Spike answers.
Dru steps closer, sniffing the air. "You've seen daddy. Is he coming home? Did he give you a present?"
Spike pulls her close. "No love. He's not coming home. He's never coming back, and he doesn't have presents for us. He only ever gave me one thing, you. Now, please, forget about him."
"He will come home to us. One day. It's a glorious night, Spikey, but the sun is coming soon. Will you watch the stars dance with me?"
Spike gently kisses his lover, and tries to push away the memory of Angel's scent and taste. He hopes that Dru is wrong, that Angelus will not return to them. "Anything you like, Dru."