Secret Slasha – The Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel Slash Fanfiction Secret Santa Project
Secret Slasha – The Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel Slash Fanfiction Secret Santa Project

Spin The Bottle
By Faithtastic
For Lar

Thwacka. Thwacka. Thwacka.

It seemed like such a good idea after draining an entire bottle of tequila between five of them. But as the spinning bottle came to rest, the neck pointing toward Xander, he was beginning to regret his suggestion. He shifted uncomfortably, sitting on crossed legs.

It was Kennedy's turn to ask a question and she had what could only be described as a glint in her eye. At times like this, he really missed Tara.

"Let me think..." Kennedy tapped her chin in mock contemplation. She exchanged a glance with Willow and smiled - an unmistakably fiendish smile. "Xander, have you ever had a homosexual experience?"

Suddenly every set of eyes in the room was rooted upon Xander. Sitting across from him, Andrew struggled to conceal a smirk.

"Well..." Xander swallowed. "Um..." He looked at Anya who was staring at him expectantly.

He jumped to his feet. "Okay, can I just say that I'm really not comfortable with that question."

Realisation dawned in Willow's eyes. She gasped. "Was it Larry Blaisedale?"

"Larry? No! It was just that one time he cornered me in the locker room and I didn't even - " Xander paused. "Never mind."

"Nah," Buffy piped up. She folded her arms, a smug expression on her face. "He had a crush on Riley. He practically told me so."

Xander blinked. "What? No, that was a throwaway joke. Xander makes with the funny."

"Xander, it's okay," Anya said in what she thought was her reassuring voice. "The Greeks indulged in hot gay sex all the time."

"You know, in some cultures it's considered a rite of passage. An adult male, someone like Mr Giles, for example, would... initiate their young protégé," Andrew added, a dreamy look in his eyes.

"Thank you for that mental image, which I'll never be able to scrub from my brain." Xander shot a beseeching look at Kennedy. "Could you just ask me something else? Please?"

"Okay," the girl said magnanimously. She waited for Xander to sit down again and for the room to fall silent. "So... who did you have the hot gay sex with?"

Xander groaned, knowing that he was not going to evade this. He looked at each of them in turn. "You all have to promise me that what I'm about to tell you does not go beyond these four walls. On pain of excruciating death."

Everyone nodded and murmured their assent.

Clearing his throat, he began. "You remember that summer after High School, when I took that road trip..."


It was a slow Sunday night at the "fabulous" Ladies Night club. Xander had spent most of the evening cleaning glasses in the health hazard that was the kitchen. Just him and the rats and the distorted refrains of Y.M.C.A. coming from the main part of the club. He glanced at the dog eared copy of On The Road sitting on top of the microwave. That book was supposed to be his talisman, his good luck charm and companion on this odyssey.

More like a jinx.

2 miles out of Oxnard and that rust bucket that passed for a car had broken down. So he'd been forced to scrape some money together to get it repaired. For the past month and one week he'd been washing dishes in a male strip club - not exactly the epic adventure he'd envisioned.

"Hey, Harris!" The manager popped his head around the door. "I need you to go out there."

Xander blanched. "Oh no, there is no force on earth that will make me do that again."

The manager gave a chuckle, which was overtaken by a hacking cough. It was perhaps a full minute before he was able to speak. "Relax, kid. Just need to you to tend the bar while Mike takes his break."

Relieved, Xander wiped his forehead. Taking off his rubber gloves and apron and tossing them aside, he wandered through to the bar. And was taken aback to see absolutely no women in the place at all. Just men. Lots of burly men in tight fitting clothes. Glancing to the wall, he noticed a poster depicting a large, muscular man with a handlebar moustache. Apparently, it was Gay Night.

Mike shoved a dishtowel into Xander's hands and slapped his ass. "Good luck. They love fresh meat."

Xander opened and closed his mouth like a guppy but Mike was already gone by the time he harnessed his powers of speech.

"Hey! Any chance of getting served here, stud?"


Xander was pouring a drink and was aware that he was being watched. Up until now he'd been trying to ignore the attention, figuring that if he pretended it wasn't happening then it really wasn't happening. As tactics went, it was pretty lame.

"Heard about you up there last weekend," a voice piped up and Xander looked towards the direction of its owner. A guy with very blue eyes nodded towards the stage. "Heard you looked like you were gonna die of fright."

He looked young, not like most of the guys in here, and he was wearing a cowboy hat. Xander also noticed that this guy had lips like a girl. Pink and kind of soft looking. He blinked, trying to push that thought out of his head.

"I have this strange phobia of being naked in public." Xander pointed to the towel slung across his shoulder. "Besides, I'm employed to wash the dishes. I'm pretty sure there was nothing in my job description about gyrating in a posing pouch in front of strangers."

The guy smiled and looked down at the beer in his hand. "Must've been quite a sight." His eyes flicked back up to Xander's face. "Wish I'd seen it."

Xander twisted the dishtowel in his hands. "There seems to be this misconception – and you're not first to say it – that I'm gay. But I'm not."

The guy's eyes twinkled in amusement. "You're not?"

"No. Because, boobies? Love them. I'm all about the girl parts, okay?"

The guy lifted his beer bottle and took a slug. "Whatever you say. I'm just making conversation."

There was a lull as Xander served some other patrons but he could still feel those blue eyes looking at him speculatively. "So how do you know you're not?" The guy lifted an eyebrow. "I mean, have you tried it?"

Fortunately Mike chose that moment to return from his break and Xander gratefully returned to the kitchen. Except when he turned around to take a trip to the bathroom, that guy was blocking the doorway. Xander could see now that he was short and compact and more urban cowboy than redneck. He took off his hat, revealing hat-flattened spiky hair underneath.

Xander was sure he looked petrified, yet he didn't move as the guy approached. "Please, I like my virgin ass and I want to keep it that way."

The guy's eyebrows knitted together. "Jesus, I'm not gonna fuck you. I just wanna show you something, that's all."

The guy reached into his back pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He unfolded it and handed it to Xander.

"Oxnard Gay & Lesbian Youth Alliance?" Xander read aloud in bemusement.

"I understand how difficult it is to come out to yourself, let alone the world. Talking to other people who've been there can help. You should check these guys out."

"But - " Xander was cut short by lips on his own as the guy leaned up and kissed him. It was a short peck and he felt the briefest graze of stubble against his chin. Those lips were as soft as they looked and tasted faintly of beer and cigarettes.

Xander swallowed and looked downwards at the stiff shape rapidly forming in his pants. The guy followed his gaze and smirked. "In case you ever feel like bragging about your first gay kiss, the name's Lindsey."

With that, Lindsey replaced his hat and strutted out.


There was a stunned silence in the Summers' kitchen. Xander looked nervously at his assembled friends.

"Okay, pay up," Kennedy announced suddenly, holding out her hand. There were grumbles as Willow, Buffy and Anya reached into their pockets and produced ten dollar bills, which they shoved into Kennedy's open hand. The girl smiled triumphantly.

"Hold up. You guys put a wager on this?"

Willow shrugged. "Just a small one," she said in a little voice.

"But I'm not gay."

Andrew patted Xander's thigh. "You keep telling yourself that. Carpentry is an admirably butch profession but gaydar doesn't lie."

"Anya, back me up here?"

"Please, a woman that fabulous could turn any man temporarily straight," Andrew replied.

Anya looked pleased at the compliment.

Defeated and holding his head in his hands, Xander sighed. He knew he should've suggested Scrabble.